Aftermath
by junkpuppet225
Summary: A girl from Jesse's past shows up after Jane's death. This is their story. Jesse/OC
1. Chapter 1

Title: Aftermath

Summary: A girl from Jesse's past shows up after Jane's death. This is their story. Jesse/OC

 **Disclaimer: I do not own anything related to Breaking Bad nor am I making any money from the writing of this fanfiction. I do not own the rights to any lyrics written within this story either. Rated M for language and situations in later chapters. Read at your own digression.**

xXxXxXxXxXxXxXx

Jesse flipped open his phone and dialed Jane's number for the hundredth time, leaning back against the wall closest to the window. _Hey if you're selling something I've got four words for ya - do not call list. However, if you're cool - leave it at the beep._ Her perky voicemail filled his head as he stared out the window to the deserted street unblinking - watching as the last minute of daylight slipped past the horizon; casting darkness on ABQ - consuming him from the inside out.

Jane was dead.

He had mixed her last speedball and it had killed her.

Jesse snapped the phone shut quickly, sinking down onto the floor.

All those people on the planes that had crashed; dead because of him. A sob escaped him at the thought. He pulled his legs up into his chest, letting his grief wash over him - wrapping his arms around his knees tightly as he stared out the window with blurred vision, silent tears streaming down his face.

Combo was dead. Jane was dead. All the passengers from those planes, gone. He watched that good for nothing tweaker get his head smashed over nothing. His parents dreaded to even see him. His life was falling apart around him and he had no one except Mr. White who was too busy dealing with his own bullshit to give a damn about him.

Jesse buried his head in his arms at the thought; letting the darkness take him in.

xXxXxXx

 _ **"It kills me not to know this, but I've all but just forgotten - what the color of her eyes were and her scars or how she got them. Seldom do these words ring true; when I'm constantly failing you and if this ain't love then how do we get out - 'Cause I don't know how..." (Savior - Rise Against)** _

Jesse lifted his head quickly as a sudden knock echoed through the empty house. He glanced outside noticing a lifted Jeep Wrangler now parked beneath the street light but there was no sign of anyone lurking around his house.

"Jesse?"

He froze in place, staring at the wooden door between him and a voice he would know anywhere.

"I know it's been a while, I just..."

Jesse opened the door slowly, staring at his company as if he'd seen a ghost. Becca Holt, the girl he had grown up with, known since he was two years old, taught to drive, fell in love with and walked away from seven years ago was standing before him in all her glory.

"What," His voice came out rough and barely audible as he cleared his throat and tried again. "What do you want, Becca?"

He instantly wished he would have said something else as he watched her blond hair fall past her shoulder as she looked down at her fingers and began to chew on her bottom lip like he had seen so many times in the past. After a moment she looked up at him again, meeting his matching blue eyes with her own. Becca was the first person he had ever loved and just like everything else in his life he had managed to fuck that up perfectly.

"Jane was in my psych class at CNM. She told me a few months ago she was dating "some guy named Jesse who wore baggy clothes and smoked a lot of weed."

"That could be anybody." He stated quietly, unable to take his eyes off her. She looked exactly the same as the last time he had seen her which brought back a flood of memories he just didn't have the brain power for right now.

"She said you told her your last name was Jackson but it was actually Pinkman. She called you a wanna be drug dealer."

His gaze fell at that, swallowing hard.

"I'm sorry, Jesse. I know it's been forever but I just wanted to check on you. Your mom said you lived here again and I just..." She frowned at him from across the threshold, stepping back on her heels to leave. Jesse's had never wanted to hit the meth pipe so hard in his life - mind racing as he finally found his words.

"I'm fine," He stated almost mechanically - unable to meet her eyes. It had probably been a mistake coming here but she couldn't sleep at night thinking about what he must be going through. They had kept their distance from one another for years but she knew him better than anyone - she knew that he couldn't look her in the eye when he was lying and that he would blame himself for Jane's death and whatever had happened because of it. She knew he was anything but fine.

"Fair enough. I'm sorry to bother you so late. I couldn't sleep and I saw a light on inside." She pointed to his house before lifting her hand in a small wave. "Bye, Jesse. Take care of yourself." Becca whispered before turning to take her leave. She made it nearly off the front porch before he called her name.

"Yo, Becca. You want to come inside or something? I can't sleep either."

Becca turned back to him and smiled, nodding as she made her way inside.

 ** _"That's when she said I don't hate you boy, I just want to save you while there's still something left to save." (Savior - Rise Against)_**

xXxXxXx


	2. Chapter 2

**xXxXxXxXx**

"I've got uh," Jesse opened the refrigerator and peered inside - scanning the small ice box for anything consumable. A six pack of beer, two Gatorades, half a pack of slice cheese and mustard. "Gatorade or beer?" He finished before glancing back at Becca. She was standing against the furthest wall taking in her surroundings - no furniture or pictures on the wall; or any sign of life in the entire house.

"Um, Gatorade is fine, thank you."

He tossed her one and nodded back to the living room - sitting down across from her on the floor. He studied her for a long moment - taking in the girl he hadn't seen in nearly a decade. She hadn't changed much in seven years - still the same small girl with ripped jeans and shirts two sizes too big. Tonight she wore a long sleeved gray thermal that looked oddly familiar and jeans with a small rip in the knee. He imagined there were plenty of his clothes still around her parents' house - if they hadn't burned them all.

"Sorry there's no furniture. I guess I haven't gotten around to it yet."

Becca shrugged, grinning at him from behind the blue bottle of Gatorade. "It's okay. The house is beautiful. You'll have a really nice place once you get settled in." Jesse nodded, taking a long drink from his beer as he looked around the empty room. He honestly hadn't thought about furniture or living here. He had thought about torching the place a few times but hadn't gotten around to that either.

"So, TwaughtHammer didn't make it far. We've got a few videos on YouTube but that's about it. Badger broke the camcorder right after Fallacies came out."

Becca laughed at the thought.

"Well with a name like that."

Jesse grinned, "Yo you were all about some TwaughtHammer back in the day. You were our first groupie."

"I was just trying to be nice. Didn't Badger cry when I told him it was a stupid band name?"

The memory of Badger becoming crazy defensive over the band name caused Jesse to laugh out, shaking his head as he recalled Brandon nearly in tears explaining how awesome it would sound on the radio.

Becca laughed with Jesse, taking another sip as she watched him smile from across the room. "He stormed out of the garage and didn't talk to us for almost a week."

"Do you still talk to Badger and Combo?"

His smile faded at the thought of Combo and he took another long drink. "I see Badger sometimes. Combo," He shook his head no and looked away. "He got into some shit a few months back and got killed."

"Drugs?"

He nodded slightly and swallowed the rest of his beer quickly.

"I went to rehab after Jane... died."

"Jesse, we don't have to talk about this." Becca assured, frowning at him from across the room. It was painfully obvious he was struggling with losing Jane and apparently Combo too. She hadn't known about him. Her heart ached at the thought of Christian being killed over drugs.

"It's my fault there both dead. Combo was working for me and Jane," A sigh escaped him before he continued. "I got her back on the shit. It's my fault."

"I doubt that Jesse."

"She was sober, yo. Had her 18 month chip then I fucked it all up. I fucking killed her, Becca."

She could only watched as he broke down in front of her - hands shaking as he sat the beer bottle down beside him and covered his mouth with his hand - reliving the past few months over and over in his head. Becca reach out and touched his arm suddenly - causing him to look up at her with eyes pleaded. "That could be you right now Becca. If I wouldn't have been fucked up that night and we hadn't broken up - you'd be dead now too."

A sob escaped his throat as she leaned forward and wrapped her arms around him, pulling him into her embrace as she sat on her knees before him. Jesse held onto her as if she were slipping away - sobbing into her shoulder as she ran her fingertips down his back, his breathing erratic and strained; she could feel his own heart beat against her chest as he clung to her.

"Jesse," Becca spoke his name softly, her voice low and calm as his fingers dug into her - gripping her closer. It wasn't the first time he had suffered a panic attack but most of them were brought on from smoking to much meth. Due to his recent sobriety his one seemed much, much worse.

"Do you remember when we were twelve and you wanted everyone to start calling you JB?" She continued, repeating the soothing motion on his back as he started taking deeper, calmer breaths. "That was about the time Badger got his nickname."

"He must have said it a hundred times a day."JB - what's up after school? JB - your mom gonna let you go to the mall Saturday?" I hated it after two days."

Becca laughed at the thought, pulling away from Jesse's embrace as his breathing returned to normal and the panic on his face faded away. He stared at her for a long moment - searching her eyes with his own. Whenever his parents were giving him shit or the guys were getting on his nerves, Becca had always been the one to calm him down.

"What?" She finally asked as he reach out and touched a fallen strand of her white blond hair, brushing it back behind her ear as his gaze fell. "I should have never let you go, Becca."

 **xXxXxXxXx**

A/N: Thanks for the great reviews! Keep them coming! I went through and re-vamped the first two chapters just to give them a little more depth and substance. Writing new chapters and hoping to get them uploaded soon!


	3. Chapter 3

**xXxXxXxXx**

A/N: For the sake of this story let's just say Jesse and Becca had 12th grade chemistry (instead of junior year as it states on Breaking Bad wiki ;)

Seven years earlier. JP Wynne High School, ABQ New Mexico.

"What up, bitch?"

Becca grinned as Jesse rounded the corner and caught up with her, sliding his arm around her shoulder as she tried to shrug him off and move out of another student's way.

"Don't call me bitch, bitch."

He laughed as she smacked him away; spotting Badger at the end of the hall with a look of pure paranoia on his face. "Fucking Badger. Yo, I gotta bounce but I'll see you at lunch okay?" Before Becca could protest his ditching class or even get a word out Jesse gave her shoulder a squeeze and took off down the hallway - dodging people as he met up with Badger and disappeared into a nearby stairwell.

xXxXxXxXx

"Yo, space man."

Jesse ignored Combo as he watched Becca enter the lunch room and wave, grabbing an apple from the front before making her way towards them. Badger had completely screwed up his earlier plans of asking Becca to prom before one of these other goons got to her. All because one of the regulars didn't have enough money to cover the pot they had split on the bus.

"Here comes Becca. I saw her talking to Derek Adams before class this morning. Probably about prom." Badger announced with a laugh, grinning at Combo as Jesse came alive and turned towards them. "What?"

The friends just shrugged as Becca walked up to the table and took her usual seat beside Jesse. "What's up losers?" She asked sweetly before taking a bite of the apple, looking between the three friends as if she'd missed something. Combo and Badger were giggling among themselves like a bunch of teenage girls while Jesse stared at her with his usual serious expression.

"Did I miss something?"

Badger continued his high pitch laugh - knowing all too well that Jesse wanted to be with Becca more than anything in this world but she was clueless. Derek Adam's wasn't even at school today.

"Badger was just talking about prom." Combo assured between giggles causing Becca to smile. "Oh, you guys going together?" She asked suddenly, causing the guys to stop laughing and Jesse to chuckle at the thought.

"I gotta smoke, yo." He stood from the table and nodded towards the door - indicating that he wanted Becca to come with him.

"Bye guys. Good luck finding that perfect dress." Becca added before she disappeared outside with Jesse, grinning as Combo shot her the middle finger - looking anything but amused now.

"What's up with them?" She asked once they were across the soccer field where all the students who smoked gathered after they were finished with lunch. The teachers usually didn't say anything to the seniors so Jesse lit a smoke - taking a long drawl before he answered her. "Badger said you were going to prom with Derek Adams." He exhaled.

Becca met his blue eyes with her own. "Badger's full of shit." She assured as he took another hit from the cigarette and nodded, agreeing with her. "True." He added, glancing over at her for a second before looking away. This morning he had game - he had spent the whole night pumping himself up to ask her to prom and Badger had ruined it. Smoking the rest of his pot hadn't helped much either - his brain wasn't as clear as it had been earlier.

"So, um, we could go to prom together if you want."

He met her gaze quickly. "Or not," adding before she could reject him. "I mean you know whatever."

Becca couldn't hide the disappointment on her beautiful face as she looked down at her hands, chewing at that bottom lip like she did every time something was bothering her. Jesse idly wondered what it would be like to bite her lip, or kiss her. He swallowed hard.

"Mom blew dad's check again this month. There's no money for a prom dress. I already asked." She muttered quietly, feeling embarrassed that her family lived well beyond their means and she was usually the one who suffered because of it.

"You could wear a trash bag and still look beautiful." Jesse whispered between them - eyes going wide as he realized he said that out loud. Becca smiled at him - a bright smile that lit up his whole world. "Prom is lame anyway. Dad's got recruiting in Texas this weekend and mom's going to visit her sister upstate. You could come hang out if you wanted."

Jesse nodded, "Sounds way better than some lame ass prom." He assured; flicking the cigarette butt away as they made their way back inside the cafeteria to check on their butt hurt friends.

xXxXxXx

Prom Night.

Becca glanced towards her bedroom window from her computer desk as Jesse's hand came into view, huffing and grunting as he did his nightly climb up the exposed brick on the side of her house. A minute later he was climbing through the open window with a grin, looking handsome as ever in his oversized clothes.

"You need to lay off the cigarettes, bro. Among other things."

They just laughed as he began tossing random items on her bed from his jacket pockets. A full bottle of Tequila, two limes, a salt shaker and bag of weed before he flopped down himself.

"Bringing the party to you bitch." Jesse said with a huff, grabbing at his chest as he took in deep breaths of air. He used to climb that wall in a matter of seconds but that was ten years and about a hundred packs of cigarettes ago. "I told you mom and dad are gone. You could have used the front door."

Jesse lifted his head and looked at her seriously, taking this information in before discarding it quickly. He couldn't remember a time when he had ever used her front door.

"Yo, what is that? I like that shit." He stated, changing the subject to the music playing through her computer. "Bone Thugs and Harmony."

Jesse nodded his head to the beat watching as she moved across the room wearing her usual ripped jeans and his favorite red Nike shirt that he hadn't seen in forever. Her hair fell down her back in long blond waves, brushing against his arm as she sat down beside him and picked up the Tequila bottle. She looked more beautiful than she ever could in some stupid prom dress.

"Mr. White knows you skipped class today. He saw us together this morning after breakfast."

Jesse sighed, covering his face with an arm. That was the last thing he wanted to talk about tonight. She had been busting his balls for two weeks over his sudden lack of academic commitment.

"I'm not bitching at you. I just don't want you to fuck up and not graduate. We are so close to getting out of this town."

After a minute he glanced at her, agreeing.

"I'll do better, right?" Becca rolled her eyes at the thought, opening the bottle of liquor. "Scouts honor, yo." Jesse put his hand to his heart and grinned at her. "Nothing but the straight and narrow after tonight."

Their eyes met again, matching blue hues sparkling in the low lit bedroom. "After tonight." Becca repeated with her own grin, turning the bottle up.

xXxXxXxXx

Five hours later the bottle was empty, the bag of weed gone and Becca and Jesse were passed out on the bed together. Her head on his chest as he breathed in steadily - stirring once the fast beat song changed on the play list to Ludacris' sultry Splash Waterfalls.

 _Oh! Oh! Oh! Say it. (Make love to me.)_

 _Oh! Oh! Oh! Say it. (Fuck me.)_

He moved his weight slightly causing Becca to turn and place her ass against him, pressing her back into his side as a groan escaped his lips. They had spent the entire night dancing, rapping, smoking and drinking - the best night of their lives until they apparently overstimulated and passed out. Now this song was playing - causing his already altered brain to think of things he desperately tried to keep out on a daily basis. What would it be like to touch her? Run his fingers down her side and into her shirt? What would it be like to have sex with her? _Fuck._

Now it was 4am and Jesse had a raging boner for his best friend who had always only been just that. As if on cue and God forbid he ever have an ounce of luck Becca turned on her stomach and glanced over at him from behind her fallen hair, causing another groan to escape him as her shirt rode up just enough to expose her soft tan skin.

"Fuck, Becca. You damn cock tease."

 _Oh, Oh, Oh. (Make love to me.)_

 _Oh, Oh, Oh. (Fuck me.)_

She sat up on her elbows and looked down at the tormented look on his handsome face - never losing her smile. "Who said I was teasing, Jesse?" The way his name slipped past her tongue was his undoing - causing him to reach up and grab the back of her head - pulling her down into a passionate kiss that she returned just as eagerly. Within seconds Becca was on top of him, kissing him with a years' worth of built up desire as his fingers found the hem of her shirt - lifting the red material over her head as she found his mouth again; fingers in his hair - pulling him towards her as they kissed. Several agonizing minutes passed before she finally broke away with a gasp - lungs burning as they stared at each other.

"Jesse,"

He never dropped her gaze.

"Make love to me."

Her voice was soft as he searched her eyes for another long moment, silently asking if she really wanted that. A slight nod of her head as all the reassurance Jesse needed as he sat up in her bed and pulled Becca into his arms; returning his mouth to hers as she laid back on the bed and he advanced on top of her quickly.

 _Oh, Oh, Oh. (Fuck me.)_

xXxXxXxXx

Two weeks later.

"You'll be in class right?"

Jesse nodded, returning his mouth to Becca's as they said their usual goodbye's to one another before school started. She was leaned against his car - his hands in the back of her hair - holding her in place as he kissed her desperately.

"I've got to go." She whispered, gasping as he bit at her bottom lip. "Let's go. Let's just leave now - Jake has swim class at nine. Nobody will be there for at least two hours." Jesse whispered back, kissing her again before she could answer.

"Class, Jesse. I've got a test today. You'll be in chemistry right?"

He finally put some space between them and nodded. "Scouts honor, remember." Assuring as she kissed him one last time and walked off towards her first class of the day with a smile. He hadn't kept his promise to her - only showing up to one class after she bitched him out in the hallway last week. Luckily he had three hours before chemistry - surely he could get everything he needed to do done before then.

Surely.

"Yo, Jesse."

Badger appeared in the parking lot - nodding towards the soccer field as they glanced around and headed to their usual meeting spot.

xXxXxXx

"Yo, you down or what?"

Jesse looked up at Combo slowly; shaking the thought of Becca from his mind as he watched his tall friend pull a bag of clear rocks from his pocket - throwing it at him. "This shit is legit, bro. Once you hit Crystal - you won't give a fuck about Becca."

"Yo, fuck you Badger. Don't fucking talk about Becca like that."

Badger lifted his hands in defense, "I'm just saying bro. This shit is amazing."

Their grade school friend Emilio had brought some meth back from Mexico and Jesse was about to test it out for the first time. "Yo, Crazy says his uncle is getting hella coin from this shit over there. He says we can make it here and sell it for stacks and stacks of money."

Jesse nodded, liking that idea as he loaded up a pipe and put it to his mouth - inhaling deeply as he took his first hit of Crystal Meth.

In Mr. White's chemistry class the late bell was ringing as Becca glanced over at Jesse's empty seat with a frown.

xXxXxXx

"What the hell, Jesse? What's wrong with you?"

Jesse looked up from the picnic table's bench - shielding his eyes from the sun as Becca came into view - her white blond hair on fire as the sun danced behind her - illuminating her.

"Becca."

Was all he said. He was lying on his stomach with an arm over each side of the bench - face down and smiling. "Listen I'm getting ready to go to White's class, alright? I just had to stop and take a break. Fucking earth is moving, yo."

Badger began laughing uncontrollably a few feet away. "Yeah it is - fucking moving yo."

"What the fuck, Christian? Shut the fuck up Badger - they should have named you Hyena - you giggling ass mother fucker."

Combo began to laugh with Badger - shoving him as they started gathering their stuff. "Don't be like that Becca. Everything's cool." Badger assured, grinning at her as he handed Jesse's keys over. "I suggest you drive."

A minute later Becca and Jesse were alone on the edge of the soccer field. "Jesse? Come on - we've got to go." She said with a growl, slapping him on the back. He didn't budge. "Yo, I gotta go to White's class bitch. Becca's fucking waiting on me and I promised her."

"It's five o'clock Jesse! You've been out here all day - school is over."

Jesse lifted his head again and looked up at Becca.

"Fuck."

"Yeah, fuck. Your mom's going nuts. I told her you were doing after school shit to make up some work but there's no way you can go home like this. What are you on?"

He mumbled something she couldn't understand and returned to the bench - clutching it as if the world was spinning away from him. Becca cussed under her breath and pulled him into a sitting position - his head falling forward then back before he finally acknowledged her with a smile.

"Yo, Becca. I'm headed to Mr. White's class. As soon as this shit stops spinning."

"Come on, Jesse."

He stood up on shaky legs as they walked to the student parking and got in his car. Jesse slumped in the passenger's seat as Becca got behind the wheel and drove them to his aunt Ginny's house. Jesse didn't say much as he walked into the house and fell on the couch face down - nearly passed out as Ginny made her way into the living room.

"Hey kids." She said with a smile, hugging Becca as they looked down at Jesse. "What's he got himself into this time, darling?"

Becca just shook her head, asking if she could use the phone.

"Of course, it's in here by the fridge."

She dialed Jesse's house and assured Mrs. Pinkman that Jesse was with her and they were going to visit Aunt Ginny for a while. Once she hung up she forced a smile towards Ginny and motioned for her to sit down just as she began a terrible coughing fit. A few minutes later Ginny was back in her living room chair and Becca was making her dinner - glancing over at Jesse who was still passed out on the worn down couch.

 **xXxXxXx**

A/N: I hope this update doesn't disappoint! Running on empty and I haven't proof read very well. Please review and let me know what you think! 3


	4. Chapter 4

XxXxXxXxX

Jesse leaned against his car as he inhaled the nicotine from his cigarette - glancing around the parking lot for Becca. They hadn't talked since he woke up on Ginny's couch two days ago - brain in a fog and unsure of how he even got there. Ginny had told him that Becca dropped him off and was clearly upset but her loyalty was unbreakable and she refused to talk about what had happened between them.

Ginny's words echoed in his head, " _Your family has to love you, Jesse but your friends? They choose to - remember that."_

"Yo, Jesse."

He looked up at Badger and nodded, flicking the finished cigarette to the ground. "Yo," They slapped hands. "You seen Becca?"

Badger shook his head no, searching the parking lot for their blond friend. "Not since you tweaked out at the soccer field Friday, dude. You gotta learn to pace yourself with that Mexican shit. They ain't fucking around down there." Jesse turned his head slightly; he could pick Becca out of a crowd of a million people. She was standing a few feet away talking to Derek Adams, the football teams quarter back - straight A student and all around dick head. Becca smiled up at him and handed over a notebook before waving goodbye and heading towards the bus. Her parents had yet to buy her a car. "Yo, Beck!" He yelled suddenly, unable to hide his anger at seeing her with Derek.

Becca stopped in her tracks and looked at him; losing her smile.

"I'll catch you later, yo." He muttered towards Badger - jogging across the parking lot to meet up with Becca. "You avoiding me?"

She looked up at him and shook her head. "I figured you were too busy with your bullshit. Not trying to deal with that ever again." She muttered, wrapping an arm around herself at the thought of Jesse nearly passed out on a picnic table. He narrowed his eyes at her, pulling another cigarette out.

"What were you even on Jesse? I've never seen you like that before and honestly it scared the shit out of me. I thought you were going to die."

He rolled his eyes at the thought. "Give me a break, Becca. I had the situation under control, alright? I was just having some fun."

"That didn't look like fun to me. You were completely fucked up Jesse. What were you on?" Becca raised her voice slightly - feeling the anger she had from the other night rise up within herself. "Yo, can we talk about this shit somewhere else?" Jesse growled, nodding towards the bus driver.

He grabbed her wrist and pulled her towards his car as the school bus pulled out of the parking lot. "Don't," Becca growled - jerking her arm away from him. "Don't act like this is no big deal, Jesse. There's no way you're going to graduate now and I fucking know that wasn't just some bull shit weed you were on. Stop fucking lying to me!"

"It's none of your business what I do, Becca. You're not my fucking mom, yo. Fuck!"

Becca stepped back from Jesse as he glared at her - tired of having to hear about what a fuck up he was becoming. "Fuck this shit," He said quickly - narrowing his eyes at her before he turned and stormed off towards his car - leaving his best friend alone in the school parking lot without a ride.

xXx

Two weeks went by and Jesse didn't bother coming to school or talking to Becca. He kept with Badger, Combo and their new friend Crystal(meth) now.

 _"Yo, yo, yo. One four eight - three to the three to the six to the nine. Representing the ABQ - What up, beeotch? Leave it at the tone."_

Becca sighed, closing her flip phone as she met Combo's gaze from across the soccer field. If you can't beat them you might as well join them, she thought, nodding towards Badger as they watched her emerge.

"Yo, Becca. Sup." Combo asked carefully - watching their friend sit down at the infamous picnic table beside Badger. "What brings you to the loser table?"

"I'm here for the hard shit. I want whatever Jesse was doing that day."

Combo glanced over at Badger, considering what she was asking. Jesse hadn't been around much lately - mostly due to the fact that he became so paranoid when he smoked glass that he usually kept himself locked up in his aunt's house until he came down from his high but even they weren't dumb enough to think he'd be okay with Becca doing this shit.

"Yo, I don't think Jesse would be cool with that. You better keep to the dime bags." Badger muttered, glancing at Combo. "Jesse's not my boss, bitch. Just give it to me." She fished fifty bucks out of her pocket and handed it to Combo - watching as he finally shrugged and pulled out a small bag of clear rocks from his pocket.

"You got that pipe, B?"

X

"Hello?"

"Combo?"

"Fuck, Jesse. You need to get down here, yo."

Jesse looked down at his phone then put it back to his ear, cutting down a back street to the school. Luckily it was Sunday and very little traffic on the road as he made his way to their usual meeting spot.

"Why do you have Becca's phone?"

"Stop asking questions and just get here, bitch. Like yesterday."

Combo closed the phone and turned back to Becca and Badger who were laughing uncontrollably at nothing at all. "This is fucking awesome, dude." Badger said in-between laughs, watching as Becca leaned backward until she was eventually lying down on top of the picnic table - reaching her hand up towards the vast blue sky above her as she continued to laugh hysterically.

"Jesse is going to fucking kill us Badger - shut the fuck up. She smoked too much yo, when she comes down she's going to be fucked."

Badger could only watch as Jesse's Monte Carlo pulled onto the soccer field roughly - squealing wheels as he stomped the break and threw it in park - leaping from the vehicle. He ran towards them without a word - pulling Becca up to a sitting position.

"What the fuck man. Becca? Yo, girl - talk to me."

The laughing had stopped and now there was just mind numbing silence - causing the panic on Jesse's face to intensify as Becca went limp in his arms, still staring up at the sky.

"Yo, yo.. what the fuck Combo? She's been smoking glass?"

"She insisted, man! What the fuck were we supposed to do? We tried to tell her no." Badger stated, losing his own high quickly as he watched Becca's lifeless body. "Is she alright?" He added, standing up to pace the area in front of them.

"How much did you bitches give her?" Jesse yelled, brushing Becca's hair away from her face as he studied her. "I don't know man. You know Becca - she was going hit for hit with us. Probably like ten hits."

"Stupid mother fuckers." He muttered as Becca pushed herself away from him suddenly - looking at him with fear in her eyes before she leaned behind the picnic table and puked violently. Once she was done she found his eyes again - his own fear matching hers. "Jesse?" She asked softly as he nodded and glared at Combo. "Holy shit Jesse. I didn't mean... I thought.." Combo frowned at them both, lifting his hands in defense. "You know I'd never hurt Becca." He assured, wide eyed as Becca suddenly went limp in Jesse's arms.

"Becca? Becca?" She was unresponsive. "Fuck. Go open the passenger's side door Badger."

Jesse stood up quickly, caring Becca in his arms to his car. "Yo, where are you going to take her, Jesse?" He sat her down in the passenger's seat quickly and ran to the other side. "To the fucking hospital, yo."

xXxXxXxXx

The steady beep of Becca's IV machine eventually lulled Jesse to sleep as he sat in the chair beside her bed. She hadn't woken up yet but the doctors assured him that she would be okay. They had hooked her to several machines to keep her hydrated and her heart rate stable as well as checking her vitals throughout the night.

If he wasn't so thankful she was okay he swore he would beat her ass for the stunt she had pulled. Just because he smoked glass every now and then didn't mean she was going to. He would keep her away from that shit if it was the last thing he ever did.

The door slammed suddenly causing Jesse to jolt awake. Mr. Holt, Becca's rather large and in charge Navy Seal father was standing before him in the dark with an unreadable look on his face. He nodded to the door as Jesse stood to his feet; panic rising in his chest as he moved towards the hallway quickly. He glanced towards Becca's - afraid this might be the last time he ever saw her.

X

Once in the hallway Becca's dad allowed Jesse to walk a few feet away from his daughter's room before he slammed him into the wall, standing dangerously close.

"I'm only going to say this once, you piece of shit. If you or any of your junkie friends so much as look at Becca again I will fucking kill you. Do you understand me?" He slammed Jesse into the wall again - voice ringing through the building. "Do you fucking understand me?!"

Jesse nodded quickly, receiving another slam to the back of the head. "Use your words." He growled, tightening his grip on Jesse's neck.

"Fucking say it!"

"Yes! I understand!"

Mr. Holt glared at Jesse for another dangerous minute before finally throwing him to the floor and returning to Becca's room.

xXxXx

One month later. Graduation Day.

Jesse threw the last of his belongings into the back of the Monte Carlo - slamming the back door hard. His parents were standing at the back door with tears in their eyes - looking away as he turned to them.

"This is fucking bullshit, yo." He growled, glancing over at Becca's house as a black mustang pulled into the driveway and Derek Adams stepped out of the car. Their eyes met for a brief second before he turned to the house and the front door opened. Becca stepped outside to greet Derek; decked out in her red and white graduation cap and gown.

She had never looked more beautiful.

Jesse could only watch as she hugged Derek - who wore a matching cap and gown - before getting into the passenger's seat and driving off towards the school. He felt a pain in his chest as he turned back to his parents who were kicking him out of the house due to his recent drug activity and failing grades that caused him not to graduate. Adam and Mrs. Pinkman were no longer standing in the doorway; the front door was shut and Jesse figured with his luck the locks had already been changed.

He sighed at the thought and got in his car, pulling out of the driveway and towards Aunt Ginny's house.

xXxXxXx

Present Day. Three weeks after her first visit.

(A/N: I should say that this part of the story is taking place at the beginning of Season 3. After Jane's death but before Jesse starts cooking again.)

"This was my song back in the day." Becca assured as she turned the music up in Jesse's car - smiling over at him from the passenger's seat.

 _"Who's that bitch?!"_

Missy Elliott - Get Ur Freak On played loudly around them as they pulled into McDonald's drive thru. Jesse laughed as Becca danced to the song - just like they did in the music video. "Getcha freak on." She assured with a laugh as he ordered his food and her a milkshake. "That video is freaky as hell."

Becca agreed and took the shake as he handed it over. They had been hanging out almost every day since she showed back up in his life and things were starting to look brighter. He still thought about Jane but his life didn't feel like it was spiraling out of control like it had just a few months ago. Becca was back in his life as if everything that had happened between them was just a dream. Plus he was still clean after rehab.

Things could definitely be worse.

Mr. White had called once or twice trying to talk him into starting the business back up but for right now he just needed this with Becca.

"Yo, fry me."

Becca handed over the French fries.

"This song was the shit too." She assured, turning the stereo up again. What's Love by Fat Joe ft. Ashanti began to play around them as she grinned at Jesse and took a fry. She wasn't sure if he remembered but he did - all too well, the first time they heard this song. They were driving around town in his Monte Carlo looking for Combo and Badger - like always. "That was the life back then, huh?" Jesse muttered, mostly to himself. Life before Mr. White or meth or Jane. Combo was still alive and Badger wasn't quite as annoying. Becca was by his side where she belonged. He glanced over at her and smiled at the thought.

Becca smiled back and sang, "What's love got to do - got to do with it?"

xXxXxXx


	5. Chapter 5

Two weeks later.

"Becca fucking Holt? From high school?"

Jesse glanced over at Badger and nodded, taking a drink of his Gatorade. "The one and only." He ; mostly to himself - picturing her in his head. She was still the exact same girl she was seven years ago. Beautiful and funny. It was like the past seven years hadn't even happened and he could start over with her.

"She still smokin hot?" Badger asked - bringing him back from his thoughts. "Fuck off, yo."

This caused Badger to laugh; "Man you still got it bad for Becca after all these years? Fuck bro I don't even blame you. If she looks anything like she did in high school...," Jesse met Badger's gaze as he raised an eyebrow and grinned; holding his arms out in front of himself to insinuate a large chest.

"I'd fuck the shit out of her."

Jesse shoved him hard - causing him to nearly fall off the couch with a laugh. "Alright man," he put his hands up in a truce. "I'm just fucking with you but seriously - if you care about Becca you should probably let her go man. She's not like us - she never was. You drag her into this shit and you'll regret it."

The shit he was referring to was the fact that Jesse was cooking and selling meth with their high school chemistry teacher as well as making enough enemies to fill a room with. They both knew it was the last thing Becca would ever want to be involved in. Not that Jesse had any intention to involve Becca in his business. He had vowed a long time ago to keep her away from the drug trade and that hadn't changed since they rekindled their friendship. Somehow he would figure out a way to keep Becca safe and in his life.

Jesse sighed and ran a hand over his face - glancing at Badger as someone knocked on the door beside them.

"Dude is that her?" Badger asked quickly; jumping up from the futon to open the door. Jesse could only watch as his company jerked open the door and pulled Becca into a bear hug, grinning like an idiot. "Jesse told me you guys have been hanging out again! I told him he was full of shit but here you are!" He continued excitedly - holding Becca at arms length to get a good look at her. "You haven't changed a bit, Becca."

Becca smiled at her old friend and took a step back, glancing over at Jesse.

"Looks like you haven't either, Badger."

She stood in the doorway holding a large pizza box and a six pack of beer; glancing through the house to see if anyone else was lurking around. Her heart sank into her stomach as she remembered the fact that Combo was dead.

"Pizza and beer man? Forget what I said keep her forever."

"Yeah to bad you were just leaving, yo."

Jesse stood and ushered Badger past Becca - smiling at his confused friends protest just before the door shut in his face. He turned to Becca and stopped dead in his tracks - surprised at what he saw. Her usual ripped and comfortable attire was replaced with a light blue sun dress that fell to the middle of her thigh; her hair falling down her back in soft waves. Jesse swallowed hard; staring back at her as she looked up at him with those bright blue eyes; chewing her bottom lip.

Without a word he took the beer and sat it down on the coffee table before taking the pizza box from her and tossing it carelessly on to the futon. Becca never dropped his gaze as he placed his hands in to her hair - kissing her quickly.

To his surprise Becca returned the kiss -sliding her hands up his chest as he pulled her into his embrace. The thought of losing her was too much to bear; she was the only thing keeping him from losing his mind these days. Badger was wrong; Becca would understand that he wasn't using anymore - his business with Mr. White was just that - business.

"Becca," Jesse finally whispered against her mouth causing a soft moan to escape her. "Do you want to go upstairs?"

xXxXxXx


	6. Chapter 6

Two weeks later.

Jesse ran his fingertips up Becca's exposed back as she kissed him; her own fingers lost in his hair. This is how they spent most of their time nowadays - making out on his couch - in her bed, on the floor - in Denny's parking lot. They were eighteen again and couldn't keep their hands off each other.

After another agonizing minute Becca pulled away and took in a needed breath staring into those matching blue eyes.

"What?" He asked with a grin, touching a stand of her soft blond hair as she adjusted her position on his lap and returned the smile. "I missed you." Was all she said, leaning down to kiss him again - both hands on either side of his face as the kiss deepened and a moan escaped his throat. Jesse wrapped his arms around her thin frame and lifted them off the couch - repositioning himself so she was on her back and he was on top of her; kissing her passionately. His mouth left hers after a moment and began traveling down her neck - causing her to whimper at his touch.

"Ifastsed you too Becca." Jesse assured as he kissed past her navel; closing his eyes as she began running her fingers through his hair. He continued his torment on her body as her skirt joined her shirt on the floor beside them and he buried his head between her legs - grinning as she gasped out a breath - holding his head in place as he worked his delightful magic on her body. Perhaps they weren't eighteen again because Becca was almost positive he didn't know how to do that seven years ago.

"Jesse," She gasped, falling back on the couch as he leaned over her with a smile on his handsome face. " Yeah baby?" Becca could only look up at him with heavy eyes as her body came down from where he had taken it; reaching up to pull him into her kiss. "Tell me what you want baby." He whispered against her mouth before her fingers found their way to his jeans; unbuttoning them quickly.

"You." Becca assured breathlessly as she worked with the zipper - looking up to meet his eyes. "You're all I've ever wanted, Jesse." The emotion in her words stalled his next move and he could only stare at her unsure of what to say. He sat up on the couch slowly - bringing her up with him so they were facing each other; nearly naked and completely vulnerable.

He had spent the past few years searching for someone or something to fill the numbness Becca had left him with when she had given him the ultimatum; their friendship or meth. Jane was the only person who had ever came close and even though he was devastated by her death a part of him knew that Mr. White was right about her; Jane was just a junkie looking for a high roller to fund her heroin addiction indefinitely. Becca had never asked anything of him but to choose her instead of methamphetamine.

"Hey, I didn't mean to..."

Jesse kissed her again, cutting off her words as this new emotion took over. His once passionate kisses were replaced with something completely different as he took Becca's face in his hands and kissed her softly - pulling away after a second to look at her again. The next words that came out of his mouth had only passed his lips one other time - seven years earlier when he made the worst decision of his life.

"Becca, I fucking love you."

xxXxXxXx

Seven years ago. The day before graduation.

"Dude her dad just rock bottomed you in the hospital? That's fucked up man."

Jesse didn't bother making Badger any comment as he continued to stare out onto the empty soccer field - inhaling another hit of meth as his friend continued to talk. Mr. Holts black SUV pulled into the student parking lot suddenly and Becca stepped out, scanning the area before she made her way towards Jesse, Badger and Combo.

"Yo, I'm out homie." Combo assured, slapping Badger on his arm to assure him that he should bounce too. The last person they wanted to piss off was Becca's dad. The guys glanced at Becca as they pushed past her and a silent Jesse - disappearing off the field. "What's their problem?" She asked - looking at Jesse who just shrugged and hit the pipe again.

"So this is what your life is now? Smoking meth all day? You can still walk tomorrow. You'll just have to show up next year and actually take chemistry."

Jesse shook his head no but didn't speak, glancing down at his shoes at the thought of what she was saying. Had he just failed Mr. White's class Becca's suggestion would have made sense but he had failed every class his senior year and the principa caught him selling weed on school property two days ago while Becca was still in the hospital from her own close encounter with dope. He was expelled from school and unable to graduate not to mention his parents were kicking him out of his house and cutting him off. This was rock bottom.

Becca could only watch in horror as he lifted the meth pipe back to his mouth and took another long hit. In a fit of rage she slapped the pipe from his hand causing it to fall to the picnic table and burst into tiny pieces - bringing Jesse to life.

"What the fuck, Becca?!"

Jesse stood up quickly and brushed the glass from his shirt; glaring at her.

"You have to stop this shit Jesse this isn't you!" She yelled, a bit of hysteria filling her words. He had been her friend since they were in diapers and now he was on the brink of ruining his life. "You don't know shit about me Becca! This is my fucking life - not yours or my parents. I get to choose how I live it, yo."

" Not if you're choosing wrong Jesse! What kind of person would I be if I just let you fuck your life up like this."

Becca closed the space between them and placed her hand on his arm but he just continued to stare at her angrily, narrowing his eyes. He wasn't some after school special in need of an intervention. He had this shit under control.

"Fuck off, Becca." Jesse growled jerking his arm away from her. He needed to put some space between them before he said something he would probably regret. "Mom and dad are getting a divorce and dad is insisting I go with him to Texas to get away from... here." She said suddenly causing Jesse to turn back to her with wide eyes. "What? You're eighteen. You don't have to do what he says anymore."

Becca could only look at him with tears in her eyes as she shook her head no. "I kinda do, Jesse."

"I fucking love you, Becca. You can't just leave!"

She wrapped her arms around herself and sighed, letting her gaze drop as tears began to fall down her cheeks quickly.

"He said if you agree to go to rehab you can come with me." Becca whispered - already knowing the heart breaking . "I don't have a problem Becca! Everything is fine. Just tell him you aren't going!"

Becca shook her head no and took a step back towards the parking lot. "You have to choose Jesse. Right now. Us or this... shit."

Jesse slammed his fist down on the picnic table and glared at her. "I'm not going to fucking rehab Becca and if you walk away from this that's on you not me." He fished another bag of meth from his pocket - never letting his gaze fall from Becca's tear filled eyes. After a minute she turned her back to Jesse and walked away without another word.

xxXxXxXxX

A/N : I hope this story isn't moving too fast and doesn't disappoint. Please review and let me know what's up! :)


	7. Chapter 7

xXx

"Yo are you serious right now?"

Becca continued to stir the bowl as Jesse made his way into the kitchen; blue eyes sparkling at the thought of her making Aunt Ginny's famous fried bread.

"I figured it's been a while."

They both remained quiet for a moment - thinking about Ginny who had been like an aunt to Becca as well. She had visited her the day before she left for Texas and Ginny had died six months later. The last thing she had ever said to her was that she loved Jesse but couldn't stick around to watch him ruin his life. Ginny understood completely and promised her she would take care of him the best she could.

"What brought you back to ABQ?"

Becca stopped mixing the ingredients and looked up at Jesse, smiling as she began pouring the batter into the hot pan.

"Well mom is on husband number four and not doing so great financially. Plus I can't stand my dad's new wife so I moved back two years ago and started at CNM. Do you remember Derek Adams? He's my roommate on campus."

"Derek Adams?"

Becca laughed at the jealously that dripped from Jesse's words. "Yep. He enlisted with the Navy after high school but his boyfriend had a shit fit and he chickened out two weeks before boot camp."

"Boyfriend?"

"Yep."

"I think that news is still in the closest though so keep your mouth shut."

Jesse just nodded letting the thought of all state quarterback Derek Adams being gay sink in. He was more concerned with the news of him and Becca being roommates.

"So yeah you don't have to worry about Derek anymore." Becca teased with a grin; placing two thin pancake like circles on the plate in front of him. Jesse narrowed his eyes at the thought before digging into breakfast.

"I was never worried about Derek Adams yo. I got way more game than he ever had anyway." Jesse assured with a mouthful of food causing Becca to laugh.

"Well as much as I'd love to hang out all day again I have to get some studying done and run some errands."

"Look at you acting all responsible and shit." He muttered with a grin as Becca leaned over the table and kissed him sweetly.

xXxXxXxx

A/N: Finally we get to the part of the story that ties into the actual show. Becca leaves to go do her thing and Badger and Skinny Pete show up to talk business. (Sunset S3 Ep 6. So far my story has taken place between S3 Ep 1 and S3 Ep 6.) Just to keep an idea of the time line.)


End file.
